I haven’t worked outside the home in over 10 years now.
My twins are going to be heading off to kindergarten soon. Officially, they can go this fall, but I don’t think I’m quite ready to send them off. The selfish/emotional part of me never wants to send them to school because I don’t know what I’ll do with myself; the hovering side of me does not want them to be the youngest in their class. The practical side of me tells me to go ahead and send them to school and go back to work. Or school (like I’ve been dreaming of for years). I’m pretty sure the emotional/selfish side is going to win.
Especially when I think about some of the degrading things that have happened to me at work before. I hate feeling subjected to someone else’s whims because they sign my paycheck or are my “superior”. I really don’t like working with people who cannot keep their emotions in check and take out their personal frustrations on others.
I’m reminded of the time that one of my bosses marched me down the hall like a 2 year and into an office because he was embarrassed that someone overheard me telling him that one of his subcontractors needed to be paid. Or the time that I got yelled at/accused of stealing something that someone misplaced. Or, the time…….(you get the picture.)
And then I think that I never want to work for anyone again.
But then I reconsider and think the money would be nice.
And then I remember that I used to hate to be a child because I didn’t like always being subjected to anothers frustrations and demands. And it makes me consider that my children probably feel the same way.
And the circle begins again.
What do YOU think? Send the twins to school? Or keep them home with me….possibly forever if I can’t let them go.
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