What makes a mother?

Today an arborist came to my house to give me an estimate on how much it would cost to trim a few of our maple trees. Don’t even ask! We have some really beautiful trees on our property but we’re most concerned about the maples. My favorite is a Japanese maple whose delicate leaves are purple most of the year, but then turn scarlet in the fall. Secondly we have this “big boy” sugar maple in front of the house that is spectacular. It has presence! In the fall there is nothing like it……the leaves turn this incredible pinky peach red color and it’s glorious. In the summer it’s leaf leaden branches provide a ton of shade. The tree that needs trimming the most though is a large leaf maple or Oregon maple. It’s leaves turn yellow in the autumn, and towards the end of summer (like now) these winged pods appear that spin and flutter to the ground with the breeze. You should see the leaves on the tree…..the size of giant hands……or at least the size I’d imagine them being. I’m convinced trees like these are what made Oregonians fall in love with trees. So blindly in love that some cities passed laws about cutting them down. So, if you’re thinking of moving to my city, think red tape if you want to remove trees and think arborist if you want them trimmed because not just anyone can trim a tree correctly!

But this is all beside the point of this post. The arborist commented on all the kids (I actually had my nephew over to play so there was one extra) and was really observant. He complimented me on all the children being happy (that can be a feat in itself, can’t it?) and then said I must be a natural born leader. No one has ever said that to me in reference to my role as a mother. It makes sense, I think it happens to be true in my situation as I love to take charge, but does being a “leader” make one a mother? Is it a pre-requisite to having many children? I don’t think so, but I think it helps. My pack better know what rank their mamma carries! 🙂

But what are the requisites of being a mother?…..not someone with the capability of bearing children, but one that nurtures children? Here’s what I’m thinking. Patience. The ability to give of one’s self. A heart that never stops overflowing. Ingenuity. Common sense. Self preservation. Intuition. Imagination. Control. Self respect. The ability to forgive and ask for forgiveness in return.

What do you think? What attributes make you a good mother?

Comments

  1. 1

    Casey's trio says

    Great question…patience, intuition, selflessness, optimism and HUMOR top my list. Honestly, there is so much that goes into being a mother that it is hard for me to wrap my mind around it all.

  2. 3

    Laura says

    This question has me thinking too. I was thinking my whole work out at the gym about this. I have so many aspirations and goals in my role as a mother, and often feel like I get wrapped in the daily ho hum and just react to life. Or feel so overwhelmed by my lofty goals I set myself up to fail. I honestly want to have so many more qualities than I have now so… I will continue to think.

  3. 4

    Doug & Stacy Fournier says

    well, this has got me thinking as well, but i definitely must say what a compliment it was for him to say that!!! it’s nice to be recognized for something you do everyday, that is just your “job”!

  4. 5

    Kristin says

    You have an amazing talent for putting thoughts into words. I hope I am all those things, but I love that mom’s are LEADERS. Yes! I totally agree. You can always tell a family where the kids are in charge, not pretty. I am actually going to copy some of that, is plagiarism still the highest form of compliment?

  5. 6

    Jojomama says

    What makes a mother? Giving birth does. What makes a good mother? A mother. Good mothering is a choice. So, yes, I am pro choice in that respect.Ha!

  6. 7

    AZ says

    I think an important part of being a mother is being able to accept your kids for who they are. They come to us with likes, dislikes and opinions and I believe its important to accept that they have their own personalities. I don’t try to change my kids, but rather try to nudge them in the right direction and allow them to bloom. That doesn’t mean I don’t discipline, but rather that I use “discipline” as it is generally defined as a last resort. Keep in mind that my son is only 2 and my girls aren’t even a year yet, so we’ll see how all this goes when they are all older!! LOL!

  7. 8

    Debra says

    First, those arborists cost A LOT to trim trees!! It was insane the quote we got for our trees in FL.

    Second, What do I think makes a mother? Someone who is humble and teachable. The reason I say teachable is for 2 reasons: 1) not all kids are the same and they do not come with instruction manuals. Boy I wish my Emma did though!!! Each of my children have a different personality. What works with one does not work with the other. I am constantly needing to learn different ways to teach my children. 2) the only way I feel I will be able to raise these 5 spirits the way HEavenly Father want me to, is by listening to the Spirit. The Spirit has always been able to help me figure out ways to handle different situations.

    So there are my quick thoughts!

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